ok cant sleep and its 1:51am. this is gna be wierd (cos its heaps emotional 4 me haha) for all my followers [LOL] out there who read this but i gta get it off my chest- so i can actually sleep. i gotta say how i feel.
You were normal,
then you started lying to your family, i stood up for you in front of them
then you lied to my family, i still defended you in front of them
then you start lying to yourself, i tried to help you
then you lie to me, i still stick up for you
then you hurt me, you actually have done it so much, i didnt even notice
but now ive woken up and im done.
im not taking it anymore, Im not gonna be pushed around by you anymore. Praise God for the great friends i have that make me realise what normal friends do and what they dont do like USE ppl. like hell, you dont come to my bday party cos u gotta water your parents plants?? No joke, the message read "sorry cass i cant come gotta water the parentals' plants and clean the bird cage, love you so much xoxoxo" WTF??? SERIOUSLY must be some special effin birds and some bloody priceless, rare plants if you cant come for that reason!! i didnt really care actually, but then my family said i shouldnt take your lies. I lie to your family for you when you do the wrong thing, stick up for the s*** decisions you've made in life, and you cant even give me 5 mins on my birthday????????!! oh wait you left a card on the table and some money inside...heaps of thought and time put into that one... you always say you love me heaps and im such a great friend but it means jack.
But you know what? I still love you. But only when you are YOU. Not this person you've become. I dont even recognise you anymore. Youre so effin unpredictable!! We all want the OLD you back.
I pray for you all the time, ive even become sick of doin that. Because in the end, you cant help someone that cant help themself first. If YOU arent willing to change your life around, i cant make you do it. The other day you said to me you were jealous of my happiness and how content i am. I said that it was because i know God loves me. You rolled your eyes... 'heard that one before'. If only you knew how much God cared for you and bleeds for you right now, you wouldve never have done this to yourself, your BF and everyone else. Im so glad I know of God's love for me...I try to share it with you but you just think imma freak. You're so blinded by this fake world your consumed in. I will always love you but i can't be friends. We are just cousins for now.
You're never gonna read this
I wish you would
Cos Im too gutless to say it to your face
after all the stuff you've done, I still am concerned about your feelings.
The picture is from the last time i remember having fun with you (Christmas 08) thats the person i want back.
Ahh i feel better.I bet ppl are laughing reading this. But im being for real. for once.
